Not My Father's Son by Alan Cumming

Author:Alan Cumming [Cumming, Alan]
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
Publisher: HarperCollins
Published: 0101-01-01T00:00:00+00:00

FRIDAY 28TH MAY 2010

The next morning, when I arrived at the Imperial War Museum, I was introduced to Professor Edgar Jones, a historian and expert on military psychiatry. Of course I assumed that my grandfather must have suffered some psychological damage after such a traumatic experience in France—how could he not?—but the speed at which I was plunged into talking about his mental health made me rather anxious. I was just getting to know him, just scraping away at the picture in my hall and feeling real flesh and blood (and such derring-do!), and now I was being forced to chip away at his mind. In the place that had once housed England’s mentally ill.

“War changes people,” was Edgar’s opening salvo.

He had a kind face. I had watched him talk to Elizabeth, the director, as the crew set up the lights, and I sensed that what he had to tell me did not sit easily with him. He was as uncomfortable as I was. They were looking through the medical journals and military documents spread out in front of them, speaking in whispers. Of course this was all so that my shock could be captured on camera, and I knew this. But the need for the secrecy, and the promise of shock, created a palpable sense of foreboding. Another day, another bombshell, I thought to myself.

The night before I had been happy to spend back at my flat with Grant, and I felt my batteries were a little recharged. On Sunday I would return to Cape Town in South Africa, where I would continue work on a miniseries I was acting in. Then there would be a monthlong gap before I launched into the final piece of the Tommy Darling puzzle. I had said to Grant the night before that it was actually a good thing to have that expanse of time, as no doubt the results of the DNA test, which hopefully we would receive in a few days, would usher in a whole new level of family revelation and discussion. It would be nice to have just one of my familial mysteries to focus on for a while.

But as much as I longed for the answer, I knew that either way the DNA results would create emotional turbulence on a grand scale. If I was indeed not my father’s son, I would have to confront my mother with the news and find out why she had kept this from me for so long. Then I would perhaps start the process of contacting my real father and new family. If it was not true, and my DNA completely matched Tom’s, I would have to confront my father and once more engage with his warped and cruel mind, and also tell my mother what he had accused her of. Either way it looked like my mum was going to have the biggest shock of all of us—for she was at the center of both scenarios. I just hoped that what

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